Paint My Porch!

A teenager wanting to earn some money, decided to hire himself out as a
handyman-type and started canvassing a wealthy neighborhood.
He went to the front door of the first house and asked the owner if
he had any jobs for him to do. "Well, you can paint my porch. How much
will you charge?"
The kid said "How about 50 dollars?" The man agreed and told him
that the paint and ladders he might need were in the garage.
The man's wife, inside the house, heard the conversation and said to
her husband, "Does that boy realize that the porch goes all the way around
the house?" The man replied, "He should. He was standing on the
porch."
A short time later, the teen came to the door to collect his money.
"You're finished already?" asked the man. "Yes," the teen answered, "and I
had paint left over, so I gave it two coats. "
Impressed, the man reached in his pocket for the $50. "And by the
way," the teen added, "that's not a Porch, it's a Ferrari."

Wrong Number: College Edition

It was last Wednesday night, and Mark was sitting in his dorm room watching
television when the phone rang. "Hello?" he said.
A girl's voice came over the line. "Can I speak to Ben, please?"
Mark who lives by himself, and whose name definitely is not Ben thought it was probably
a wrong number but was bored decided to play along. "I'm sorry, he's not in right
now. Can I take a message?"
"Do you know what time he'll be back?" she responded.
Mark replied "I think he said he'd be home around 10:00."
Silence on the other end... a confused silence. "Is this Steve?"
Having enjoying himself so far Mark responded, "Yes, it is. Do you want to leave a message for Ben?"
"Well... he said he would be home tonight and asked me to call him,"
she said in a slightly irritated voice.
He replied, "Well, he went out with Karen about an hour ago, and said
that he would be back at 10:00."
A shocked voice now: "Who's Karen?!"
"The girl he went out with."
"I know that! I mean... who is she?"
"I don't know her last name. Look, do you want me to leave a message
for Ben?"
"Yes... please do. Tell him to call me when he gets home."
She was sounding pretty irate at this point, and he could hear her temper
flaring. "I sure will. Is this Jennifer?"
She exploded, "Who's Jennifer?"
Apparently she wasn't. "Well... he's going out with Jennifer at 10:00. I
thought you were her. Sorry... it was an honest mistake."
"Ben's the one that's made the mistake! Tell him that Alice called him and
she's very upset and that I would like him to call me as soon as he gets home."
Mark smiled and said, "Okay, I will... but Becky isn't going to like this..."